What the Father of the Bride Should and Shouldn't Say

So her daughter announced her marriage and introduced her to the person who is about to become her son or daughter-in-law. Congratulations!

Now you have a wedding to plan. It's important to support your daughter, so it's time to start aligning locations and vendors. You should also start thinking about what to say during the reception, which is one of the most important tasks you have during this time.

Yes, you will have to give a speech from the father of the bride. Like it or not, it's important to show your support by stepping out of your comfort zone and working on your presentation.

This is the time to express your feelings about your daughter, even if she is the type of person who keeps her emotions to himself.

Plan your speech

Even if you are the type of person who likes to talk "spontaneously", it is always a good idea to plan the speech for your daughter's wedding. Otherwise, you may ramble or risk saying something that embarrasses you. Remember, once you say something, you cannot "disprove" it.

In fact, it is a good idea to write the entire speech so that you can modify it and practice it before the event. If you follow tradition, your speech will be the first one after the wedding and at the beginning of the reception, so set a good example for others to follow.

Here are some tips for planning your father of the bride speech:

Ask your daughter if there is anything she doesn't want you to mention. This is important because you don't want to overshadow her special day.

Make a list of the topics she would like to cover. If it's long, like more than half a dozen, shorten it to prevent her speech from taking too long.

Go through your list several times before planning your exact words to make sure they are all relevant and appropriate.

Once you've listed all the topics you want to cover, go ahead and write your speech. Try to limit your presentation to about five to 10 minutes, or you will lose everyone's interest. It's good to add some tasteful humor to your speech so that the audience doesn't start to yawn.

Basic speech of the father of the bride

Familiarize yourself with your entire speech and know everything you want to cover. Even if you don't use the words you've written literally, you will at least have something to lean on. If you decide not to write everything down, at least have an outline to jog your memory.

Bring your speech or sketch to the wedding and have it handy when you present it. Even if you've practiced dozens of times already, don't go blank. Just having it there can calm your nerves and keep you on track.

Here are some basic things to cover in your speech:

Introduce you. It's okay to make a joke as long as it is clear and appropriate for all members of the marriage to hear.

Now is the time to educate your daughter and mention how proud you are of the woman she has become. You can also inject humor here, but don't embarrass her. If you are unsure about something, ask them during the planning stages. It's good to throw some funny jokes like, "Now I get my bathroom back." Something as innocuous as this will generate a few laughs without crossing the line of humiliation.

Talk about the good qualities of your character, such as your inner strength, compassion, or seeing all sides of a situation.

Bring a specific memory or two of the things he did to make you proud. There is nothing wrong with expressing emotions, but don't let that get the better of you.

Welcome your new son or daughter-in-law to the family. Mention something specific about him or her, such as the first time you met, the moment you learned that her daughter was in love, or how happy it made her. End this part by showing your support for your union.

Welcome your daughter's partner into the family and mention something about the two families becoming one. Say something nice to make them feel comfortable.

Give some tips on how to have a happy marriage. You can make a joke here because you may need a bit of levity after the emotional part of your speech. Something like: β€œWhen she's right and you're wrong, admit it. But when you are right and she is wrong, don't say a word, "she will make some laughs and maybe some roll their eyes."

Offer a toast to celebrate the newlyweds.

Introduce the next speaker: the maid of honor or the best man.

What not to say

As the father of the bride, you know more about your daughter than most people in the marriage. And something that you know is inappropriate to say now. You also don't want to dampen the cheerful mood of your guests, so stay positive.

Here are some things the father of the bride should avoid saying or doing:

Although he should have his notes with him, do not read them word for word. Use them to stay online.

Don't mention anything about the cost of the wedding. People know how expensive weddings are without being told, and bringing it up can make some people feel ashamed or guilty.

Do not mention any of the ex-boyfriends / girlfriends, husbands / wives, fiancees, or other previous romantic relationships of the girlfriend.

Avoid any mention of politics, as this can create tension at a party time.

Do not murmur. Speak clearly and loud enough that everyone in the room can hear you.

Don't say anything overtly negative about your girlfriend or her partner. While it's nice to have a little humor, keep it tame and not petty.

While a show of emotion is expected, try not to cry. This is supposed to be a happy time, and it is much more difficult for a sobbing father of the bride to make a speech.

Don't make your speech too long. There may be other people who have something to say and you don't want to bore the people who are there to celebrate and have fun.
remember your place

As the father of the bride, it is your job to show support for the bride. Your speech should reflect this. Remember that this is her special day and even though you may have contributed financially, or paid for everything, it is still about her and her partner.


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Source: Brides

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